2016 was not a hard choice. vote for the smart competent lady over the dumb rapey fascist. you fucking morons. you absolute fucking imbeciles.
I refuse to get anxious about this country while watching a hummingbird gather spiderwebs for her nest. that will happen later in the day
call me a cockeyed optimist or whatever the fuck but I’m reasonably sure that by the time this is over trump will be an outcaste and everyone who pooh poohed the committee will look like a jackass. I mean, it’s already happening.
happy independence day to everyone who believes that Donald Trump is a violent domestic terrorist and deserves to be in prison for the rest of his miserable life. everybody else can eat shit
this country is valuable. not the people, they’re just baggage. what matters is the wildlife, the forests. the ideals upon which this country was founded. fuck the people of this country. they don’t realize what they have. emotionally compromised shits. anyways, happy independence day to whoever loves and really, really appreciates this haven of liberty and wilderness.
what if, and hear me out here, instead of lighting firecrackers we just got together and listened to the song 7 by Prince
if there’s one thing I’ve learnt living in the woods it’s that insects have an alcohol problem
remind me to not climb a tree if I’m being chased by a bear
pat cipollone = final nail in trumps coffin
if Donald Trump was a black Democrat he would already be in prison for the rest of his life and the Democratic party labeled a terrorist organization. but since he’s a white Republican he could still become our next president holy fuck this country
sitting here by the campfire missing nothing of my past because it was all toxic. I’m all today and somewhat tomorrow
playing music by the campfire softly
me: shit I’m a citizen now
raises the fucking volume of the fucking music to fucking citizenship level
the older I get the more I realize that my recollections of my life are only loosely based on my actual life. might as well proactively tweak them to make them farcical and die laughing
very much enjoying this no character limit to allow my mind to wander from reality to farce. it’s very liberating
at the brewery
bartender: have you been here before, I remember your face
me: she remembers us!
my face: quiet let her speak
me playing it cool: yeah I’ve been here a couple of times
bartender: yes you were sitting right there that’s why I remember you
my face: what
me: well I wasn’t sitting right here i was here motions to the chair next to me
bartender: lol
me: lol
my face: I will cut her
I like how my wife completely disengages mentally when she visits her friends and family. I’m like I just chased a giant bear out of our backyard and she’s like “okay baby have fun 😘”. in her defense I too am mentally disengaging when I decide to chase a massive fucking bear with no backup plan.
chicken hearts mixed with garam masala and salt and air fried at 400 for 10 minutes then topped with el yucateco green. chicken hearts are such an underrated organ
sitting in my reading nook watching the Phillies game and I watch this gigantic black bear saunter right into my backyard from the side of the cabin and straight towards my bird feeders. I’m immediately like, how dare you. I run towards him waving my arms as instructed by pa state park pamphlets and howling like a werewolf (in retrospect). poor guy (in retrospect) turns back and runs across the road. I run across the road after him, howl some more at him just to make sure he received the message. there’s a car approaching and I’m like, these are probably city slickers from Jersey or new York so I ask the car to stop and point towards the bear now disappearing through the woods. look guys a bear. I chased him from my backyard. the black couple rolls down their window. the woman smiles at me and says, “okay”. I’m like you’re welcome even though they haven’t thanked me. and then I go back to my backyard to think about how the fuck did I chase a gigantic bear with no backup plan for if he chased me back.
got up too quickly from my bench and scared all the deer that were apparently right behind me. I apologize.
the only reason Donald keeps trying to overturn the 2020 election is because the 2016 election was the only time in his life when he felt like he was supported and liked by people whom he didn’t hate. now he’s back to only being liked by stupid hick rurals whom he hates and who are of no use to him other than scamming them out of their money. they are unable to offer him the emotional sustenance he requires of being liked by people who actually matter. this is why he fully believes the delusion his brain created out of self preservation, that the 2020 election was stolen from him. thank you for attending my narcissistic personality disorder ted talk.
mediocre people like Donald Trump and Jordan Peterson believe they hold some kind of leadership role in the neo fascist movement. dudebros, the neo fascist movement existed long before you came upon the scene. you’re both just useful idiots in its quest to gain social legitimacy, political legitimacy through Donald Trump and intellectual legitimacy through Jordan Peterson. you’re not leaders, you’re toilet paper. you’ll be discarded and flushed once the fascists have no further use for your services.
every headline about Jordan Peterson should start with the words “mediocre self important nitwit Jordan Peterson tried to suck his own flaccid dick and then”
I wish more white Americans would realize the implications of the fact that anyone saying anything against Donald Trump will inevitably be receiving death threats. trumpism is a fucking domestic terror movement and its leader is Donald fucking Trump. holy shit are you fucking people okay with voting a literal terrorist back into power?
in the brewery
customer 1: I’ll have the gosay
customer 2: actually it’s pronounced goss
me thinking: this is not my battle to fight but sometimes you have to fight battles that aren’t yours to fight if only to maintain law and order in society
me: actually it’s pronounced gosuh
I was sitting in the cabin backyard staring into the trees and using the alone downtime to think some thoughts and also stare at the phone and when I look up from my phone there’s a deer family ten feet away from me, mama deer and two fawns. they are all looking at me like where the hell did you come from? I’m like I’ve been sitting right here for the past hour what are you even talking about? the mama deer seems happy with my answer and then she casually walks out of my backyard and into my neighbors backyard leaving her fawns in my custody. now what? luckily just as I start to google how to lactate for a baby deer they find a section of broken fence to jump over and join their mom. after enjoying relief for maybe half a second I realize that’s a new break in the fence.
DAMN YOU, BEAR!!!!
