watching a killdeer patrol the road probably protecting its nest. I am your friend my love. I patrol with you

donalds excuses for the classified documents:

they are my classified documents. ask your dad.

I declassified them by kissing the signature page.

the FBI planted the documents and left a used condom.

I had explosive diarrhea, ran out of toilet paper and mistakenly used them to wipe my ass and the walls.

the toilet paper store was closed so I brought a whole bunch of them into the bathroom to wipe my giant gaping butthole. it uses a lot of toilet paper.

I should be able to do anything I fucking want without being held accountable. fuck you.

breaking news: donald trump says he would run for president even if he were to crash his golf cart into a pile of swords, decapitating himself and both his adult sons, their heads rolling down the hill being chased by a family of angry geese and eventually being crushed by a runaway tractor

how embarrassing for donald. if there was one thing he was good at, it was doing and getting away with crime and turns out he’s not even good at that

my county has an unvaccinated measles case. cool thanks mr rfk

holy shit this thread. Donald is fucked. which makes him extremely dangerous. once he realizes the gop house isn’t going to save him that’s when the terrorism begins 🔗 law-and-politics.online/users/Ter…

I don’t plan anything in advance ever but I’m definitely planning for next summer when donald gets convicted and the most logical thing for his terrorist followers to do would be to attack power plants

I remember back in the day I was explaining to a white friend why the Iraq war was a bad idea, the main reason being that innocent Iraqis were dying. I still remember his reply and it still haunts me to this day. “I understand what you’re saying, but what you have to understand is that I just don’t care”. we’re not fighting global warming, we’re fighting these fucking people.

I’m assuming the “another employee” has flipped so stick an apple in his mouth, the pigs done

if donald asked me to do some crime I would go up to him with tears in my eyes and say sir I love you very much and you were the best president ever and I would do anything for you, oh I would do anything for you, I would do anything for you, but I won’t do that

it’s so weird that ppl just straight up do crime when Donald tells them to. anyways have fun in prison

I should probably go back to therapy but I feel like my therapist is just going to tell me to do positive thinking and pretend that global warming is a Chinese hoax

they trod on him. I guess the flag doesn’t work

vivek ramaswamy: “young people do not value the country they passively inherit”. bhai, that applies to literally everyone of every age in this country about everything, not just citizenship. hey “da vek” why dont you go back to “libertarian rapping” and leave political analysis to ppl who’ve actually spent more than five minutes thinking about things

this is the first time i’ve seen the giant black cherry tree outside my window actually bear cherries. hell, i didn’t even know it was a black cherry. it has been fun watching catbirds, finches and other birds going to town on it.

this is the article that pushed me over the edge in terms of making hard decisions about the future in terms of lowering our impact www.thenation.com/article/w…

this essay nails it. we are out of time. we aren’t mitigating climate change anymore. we’re actively trying to survive it archive.li/hGjWt

flying for a vacation will have to stop. there’s just no getting around this www.msn.com/en-us/tra…

excited about setting a local temperature record tomorrow. gonna slather myself in sun screen, sit in the sun and cry

a good way to know if a politician is relevant is by ignoring their tweets and instagram stories and check how many times their name appears in the mainstream media for actually accomplishing things. glad to report that i havent heard a squawk about the “squad” since i left twitter

if you don’t want to get bit don’t fucking lie to the January 6 committee

what is the billionaire plan for surviving global warming and is the secret portal to the alternative world they’re building underneath the Titanic

my favorite part of the gop presidential primary is a brown Hindu trying to become leader of a white Christian cult

Canada and Europe are turning into ash and the gop has 0 serious presidential candidates promising to do anything about global warming

our first backyard baby hummingbird of the season has been spotted availing of the recreational facilities provided